ALICIA & TONY ROWE
MORE QUESTIONS FOR ALICIA:
How has having PCOD affected your relationship?
With PCOS I have to be on high doses of hormones to ovulate and they make me insane!! So as much as he tries to understand that the hormones are making me crazy it's hard for him! It's almost like he doesn't even know the women he married and honestly sometimes I ask myself who am I?? This is not the normal me!
Do you feel bad that you can't give Tony a baby?
Well thinking it was only me with the problem for the past 14 months I felt terrible as if I was useless to him. We had talked about children before marriage and I felt like my problem was holding up his dreams! Now that I was told it is both of us I feel a little relief like it's not all my fault anymore.
Do you take it personally and feel like something is wrong with you?
Yes, I always ask myself the question why me every single day. Why has everyone that started trying after me gotten pregnant? Why can't I just be normal?? It's hard when everyone you talk to asks so when are you guys gonna have a baby or the people I ultrasound say how many kids do you have?? I get down on myself knowing that I may have to say for the rest of my life that we don't have children. And most people respond with why
Have you been depressed? Yes, when I leave the Dr office with bad news I am down for the whole day. I try not to make a sob story for everyone so I usually cry all the way to work and then try to forget about it! It's sad when my friends and family get pregnant and are scared to tell me because they don't want to hurt my feelings. I am so happy for each and every one of them and don't want them to be scared to tell me, I just can't wait for the day I can tell them it's me that's pregnant! My mom has always said she doesn't know what she would do without her kids, I would love to have that feeling!!
How do you feel when you are around children?
It's bitter sweet! I am so happy to be around children because I love children but sometimes it's hard because I want one of my own so bad!! 5 of my close girlfriends including my sister all are either pregnant or just had their baby!! It's tough! I feel like always an aunt... Never a mom :(